Thursday, June 01, 2006

Taking a walk...

I've been in this role now for 5 weeks and it has struck me recently that I have a spiritual responsibility for the young people i am engaging with. Whilst i felt a responsibility for the young people in my previous job, because they mostly did not have a faith, i guess i was often more concerned for their physical and emotional well-being than their spirituality. However, with this post I am working with a solid group of about 40 young people who are already on that spiritual journey and i am seeking to fulfill the role of a spiritual leader for them! This scares me somewhat! Part of me feels completely inadequate but i think God likes using people like that! Anyway, basically i've decided that i need to build spiritual disciplines into my week to allow me the time and space to connect with God and pray, listen and reflect.

So i headed down to Oxford Island yesterday morning for a bit of a walk with God. Brought my camera with me so hope you like the pics. If you've never been there before its a beautiful place to walk (apart from the swarms of flies that is!) and really quiet and peaceful. I spent about 2 hours walking, sitting, praying, thinking and writing. It was a beautiful sunny morning too which i guess helped! I'm gonna try to make this a weekly Wednesday morning thing for me so I've blocked it into my diary already!

Anyway, i was praying for a friend of mine and thanking God for how compassionate she is. She is one of those people who's compassion immediately moves her to action. I wish i was like that but somehow i seem to be able to ignore God's compassion when it touches or challenges me. I avoid action by thinking of what it will cost me in terms of time, money, emotion... and at the end of the day will my action really make much difference in this screwed up world??? So by this stage the moment has passed and i can move on. It makes me feel really guilty to say this but often it's reality for me. I long for God's compassion to mobilise me to make a difference, no matter how small or insignificant it might appear in the grand scale of a messed up world. What stops me is entirely my own selfishness. I thank God that He is patient with me and He is not finished with me yet!

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